Let's face it break ups and divorces are hard. It is like loosing someone close to you. Sometimes there is just no other way to describe it other than "it just sucks." The pain from break ups can be massive, and sometimes that pain can feel unbearable. It is important to try to channel and experience this pain in the safest way possible. If your break up just happened, call a friend and make sure they are around when you need them. Ask a sibling or a parent if you can come visit.

Many times during break ups people try to keep their emotions inside. It is best to express these feeling to a friend or family member. If you don't have that option at least write your feelings down in a journal. Keeping a journal like this will help you get some of those feelings out in the open. Once those feelings are out in the open it is easier for you to begin to heal.

It is important to realize that you are going through an extremely tough time and you are supposed to be feeling pain. It is normal and human to feel pain like this when traumatic situations arise. Also, remember that tomorrow is a new day and things will get better day by day. Don't try to mask the pain you feel today, experience it and accept it so you can move forward with tomorrow.

Some people try to mask their pain with drugs and alcohol. This is always a temporary fix to the problem. Masking the pain of loss isn't going to make the pain go away. There is no long term help in using drugs and alcohol to cope with a break up or divorce. Besides, whether you are looking to move on or try again with your ex, the right state of mind will be key to that outcome. Stay away from drugs and alcohol in times of loss and extreme stress. Even though it is hard, look for the positives in your life and know that tomorrow won't be as hard as today.

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Esteban Torres
December 7th 2008

ConnectedAgain.com is website dedicated to helping couples stay together so they can live happy and loving lives.

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